She killed a monster down salt-marsh way.
Just what it was, she could not say.
Cleaved with her axe from crown to groin,
Reached inside and pulled out some coin.

Ass pennies, ass pennies,
Covered with waste.
They'll pay off your debts,
But may leave a bad taste.
Ass pennies, ass pennies,
Dull and unshined,
Stink like an ogre,
But pay for the wine.

Silver secured, now she needed a bath,
Went into town to see Ellie McGrath.
Gave her an urn with hot water to pour,
One tub for Aidan, and another for...

Ass pennies, ass pennies... (chorus)

Shopping for arms at the house on the hill;
The daggers and darts aren't all that can kill.
Ass pennies produced such a stench, don't you see?
The seller passed out so the dagger was free.

Ass pennies, ass pennies... (chorus)

At the Boar and Bear she called "Drinks all around!"
Patrons and tender all fell to the ground.
"Those coins stink too much, please take them away!"
But she paid with ass pennies and drank anyway!

Ass pennies, ass pennies... (chorus)

On the open road walking home on that eve,
She took a wrong turn and was jumped by some thieves.
Them cut-purse got more than they bargained for, true.
The ass pennies stunned them and Aidan cleaved through.

Ass pennies, ass pennies... (chorus)